Remember to tune in for The Fannies, our end-of-year awards spectacular. It will have all the pageantry of the Oscars, or a Friars Club roast at the very least. See who won all the categories and the fabulous prize: a coveted Fanny. It all comes to you next Thursday…

Episode 150

Woman Scorned, Weaker Bird, and New Nemesis with The Girls!

Today, The Girls are coming to you live from within the little (or not so) black book belonging to Dwyane Wade, whose wife is wanting the world to see that he’s not all that. At least not on the court, because we all know he is all that there. But if that little black book isn’t all that little maybe he’s all that there, too. Whatever the case may be, he’s going to have some splainin’ to do once those names are leaked. Especially if one of them is Star Jones. Ouch.

But real sports are happening all around us, to include Australia where the Aussie Open is on, Oklahoma where even the local paper doesn’t know the name of the local NBA team, and Providence, Rhode Island where puffy jackets don’t immediately send off signals that the dude on the court hasn’t checked in.

It doesn’t end there! NASCAR wants more slapping, the X Games have a real rivalry at last and the Yankees somehow wrangle more cash from the taxpayers who are already strapped. Is it the actual playing of a sport you seek? We have you covered in this week’s sports podcast where we delve into the upcoming Super Bowl matchup that has two sophomore head coaches, one veteran quarterback and one hyper-concussed one, a human helicopter, and a secondary scared silly of his blades. It’s not the big market ratings guarantee that the media was looking for, but for the fan it will be an interesting battle. The real question is whether or not it was Ken Wisenhunt who left love notes burned into Donovan McNabb’s front lawn. ‘Cuz that would by hysterical. But diesel fuel? Really? And how do you not take with you that which you brought, especially if it has your name and address on it? Doy. Couldn’t have been Ken, because he is simply not that dumb. Seriously, would this man torch a neighbor’s lawn?

Before leaving the NFL for almost the last time this season, The Girls imagine Ray Lewis with a star on his helmet standing in a half-empty stadium because there’s just no way Jerryville can sell out each week, send best wishes for some level of success to Spags as he wears the crown in St. Louis, and caution Rex Ryan about professing any desire for Brett Favre back behind center. Step away, Rex, step away. From Brett AND the buffet line.

The NBA is experiencing a renaissance…could it be the Obama effect? Or perhaps it’s because the East is back, the Lakers are putting on a show, Greg Oden turned 21 (snicker…snicker), and Tim Donaghy is in jail. It’s all rosey for David Stern, with the exception of that little thorn Stephon. Hey, no league can be perfect but we have to agree with Sports Illustrated - basketball is smokin’ hot this year and it’s not even the All-Star break yet.

But it is in the NHL! Montreal is the site for this year’s fete. We’ll be watching the skills challenge and so should you. Another must-see is our Rookie Look, Steve Mason, goalie for the Columbus Blue Jackets. Nothing like a shut-out goalie to lift your franchise, and that’s just what Steve is doing. Our hope is that he keeps playing lights out and goes a little lighter on the hair gel. Look, we’re chicks. Stuff like that gets to us. Hair gel - bad in excess. 1.91 GAA, six shut outs and a .932 save percentage - good. Congrats, dude. A welcome back to our favorite instigator, Claude Lemieux, who has landed on the hottest team in the NHL, the San Jose Sharks.

If he hoists the Stanley Cup in June we’ll run naked through the press box. Oh, darn. Someone beat us to that dare. Not to be outdone, Brendan Shanahan joins the Devils…because it’s really close to Bungalow 8 and he way likes it there. Too bad he can’t play goalie though, because the Islanders are looking for one, and then he would have been equidistant between the Hamptons and Manhattan. Just think of the night club options! And tanning salons! Kids, the NBA isn’t the only league that is hotter than before…the NHL is shaping up to give us fans a screaming second half, so stay tuned.

Finally, in this week’s IT HAS TO BE SAID, we wonder what ever happened to Oprah. So grab your commemorative coin, a taser for those pesky family members that won’t leave you alone whilst you work, and someone warm as the mercury plummets…it’s time to talk sports with The Girls!

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 22nd, 2009 at 11:37 am and is filed under Fantoo Blog Home. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.