The Girls extend best wishes for all as the holiday season speeds towards us. We’ll be off for Christmas so we can go undercover to blow the lid off the NFL referee scandal and then will be back for a special New Year’s Eve episode of the infamous Fantoo Fannies Awards and Extravaganza. It’s big, it’s back, it’s better than ever.

If you’d like to nominate a Fannie look for a post later in the week with this year’s categories. We need your brain trust to make this the best awards banquet evah. Then maybe the NFL will hire us to produce the Pro Bowl Banquet. We’ll beat this drum until we die.

But now we give you another freshy podcast, all wrapped up in holiday frivolity. Yea, that’s right. We said it. Frivolity.

Program note: The Girls sing in this week’s podcast. If your ears bleed sue someone else.

Episode 146

Tomb Stones, Bowl-ed Over and All My Children on the NFC Network with The Girls!

Today The Girls are coming to you live from a place where many are dead…the sporting graveyard. We meander amongst the tomb stones that honor those who have passed. Some on time, some before their time. Will the Arena Football League come back? Will they wait till the NFL gets exposed and take over the throne? And what about Sean Avery? The Girls wonder what fashion house will snap him up. And way up on the hill we find the NBA coaches, all 6 of them who have been terminated before they season even registered for anyone outside of Boston or LA. A shame, that is. Really, who’s to blame?

We’ll keep digging for answers on that one, but it’s time to move on to the world of sport, which is very much ALIVE! Sir Charles Barkley may have a fatal flaw, and it’s his mouth. Or is it his brain? Whatever the diagnosis, he needs to stop throwing the spotlight on those who don’t wish to be illuminated, white, black or otherwise. We doubt Turner Gill is psyched that Sir Charles may have blown his cover by suggesting that he should have gotten the job. Did Buffalo know he was interviewing? Did he even accept an interview? Regardless of the answers to the questions, those in Buffalo now think he was looking elsewhere, and we all know how the collegiate world responds to coaches interviewing, saying they are staying for the long haul, and then leaving in the middle of the night with nary a sound. Chaz, tick-a-lock, k?

Oh, that illustrious season known as Bowl Season. The time when every college football team plays and it’s all supposed to mean something. What, you ask? We have no freakin’ clue. We just know that the GMAC Bowl, Capitol One Bowl and the Eaglebank Bowl are probably not going to have lots of bells and whistles, nor much of a shelf life in this current economy. Rest assured that we will soon be back to a more humane number of bowl games. Like 20. Cuz 34 is just a bit gluttonous, don’t you think? After 10 or so, boredom really takes hold and then we find ourselves on the floor, in the fetal position, drooling. Not pretty.

But there is one bowl game we will be watching, the Rose Bowl featuring USC with Pete Carroll at the helm and Penn State with newly extended Joe Paterno. His contract has been extended, and hopefully not beyond the life expectancy of the man himself. We have heard from reliable sources his contract states that, should he die, he is no longer allowed to coach the team. You heard it here first.

Also in this week’s Fantoo Girls sports podcast we dish on the Hot Stove league and marvel at the hubris of the New York Yankees breakin’ the law, breakin’ the law. Does that make CC Sabathia’s an accomplice? We wish we could inflate the value of our property by 1000 percent and get us some tax free bonds and stuff.

Then it’s off to the gridiron where Robin states her case as to the sanctity of all that which is the NFL. This part-time ref thing has us a little perplexed. Shouldn’t that be regulated or something? Seriously, millions of dollars are bet each weekend and those who insure the integrity of the game are no different than the rent-a-cops that used to hang out at our high school dances. Really? And that’s okay with everyone? Well, it’s not okay with us. Alas, we watch anyway because we can’t help ourselves.

Although what we’re watching is akin to something we vowed to never watch - a soap opera. The NFC East is so daytime it makes our heads spin. (Not a good look.) The Giants have Plaxico (Dude, it’s a charity coat drive…um…that usually means bring a coat.), the Redskins have Jim Zorn and Clinton Portis and the Cowboys have that cute little threesome known as Romo, TO and their pal Whitten.

Thanks to bobanddan.com for this rare sighting of Romo not running for his life.

Which makes us wonder where the Eagles were when ‘they’ handed out dysfunction at the start of the season. Everybody else got some, how come not them? And exactly what do the Steelers have on Roger Goodell? Seems some pretty controversial calls have helped them out big time this year and now they stand on the threshold of the playoffs with some serious momentum to go along with their home field advantage and first round bye. Also firing on all cylinders as of late are the Indianapolis Colts with a nice seven victory run. We hear the Mannings are looking into having more children. They could create a small country of over-achievers if they can still procreate! Kudos to Peyton and Eli for their Pro Bowl nominations. Now, quick! Find a reason not to play because the Pro Bowl is SCARY. This week’s Fan-Tutor takes you to the line of scrimmage at the snap and beyond. Just what are the refs supposed to be doing? We clue you in and then remind you that they may be distracted. Don’t blame them. Probably something happening back at the office. You know, at their real job.

NBA firings aside, others are firing off some serious baskets like the Lakers and the Celtics. Stephon Marbury is firing off some zingers too, of the verbal variety. We’re hoping he finds it in his heart, or wallet, to pay us to do nothing but stay in shape. We’d be great at that. The Knicks should let him go, snatch up Patrick Ewing Jr. and ease on down the road. Keeping him around-but-not-really is an energy zapper they can’t afford when things are finally looking brighter for the franchise.

MEDIA ALERT: The NHL Winter Classic is bearing down upon us all. The Blackhawks (who creamed, then whipped, then filleted the Oilers) take on the Red Wings in an outdoor hockey game, and The Girls can’t wait. January 1 at 12:00 PM the boys take the field at Wrigley for some pond hockey. The only thing that would make this better is if the refs were given the day off. Now THAT would be real hockey.

Finally, after this week’s marathon podcast, we throw at you our IT HAS TO BE SAID. You better duck! So grab your shoes, some candy canes and the latest issue of Vogue…it’s time to talk sports with The Girls!

Now, in an effort to suppress your appetite…Happy Holidays from The Girls!

This entry was posted on Thursday, December 18th, 2008 at 10:35 am and is filed under Fantoo Blog Home. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.