Before we get ready to entertain you with our weekly recap and forecast of the world’s sporting action, we must take a minute to give thanks for all the drama in the NFL.

There are benchings galore, finger injuries of all kinds, rule misappropriations to get you scratching your head and the obligatory star performances and bad games to keep us coming back week after week.

And we love this.

Yet, whilst the league studiously examines the issues that could enhance the billion-dollar behemoth that it is, they seem to have taken a wrong turn in one critical area. The Girls are here to provide guidance.

Sure, there are thorny and bizarre issues like lengthening the season, showing games in 3-D, and the Lions’ decade-long death spiral. But it has come to our attention that the Goodell and company wants to change the Pro Bowl to the week BEFORE the Super Bowl.

On so many levels - why? What could this possibly accomplish other than making the game more irrelevant than it already is? And who on Earth would want their star performers, who should be playing for all the beans the next week, taking a hit like the one Brian Moorman took from Sean Taylor in 2005?

Just looking at this picture of Drew Brees (a possible MVP candidate this year) leaving the field with a dislocated elbow should be enough to make all owners come to their senses. The QB, an NFL franchise’s cash cow, should not be subjected to whippersnappers throughout the league trying to take him out before the big game.

And has anyone mentioned how gambling could find it’s way into the action? Or personal paybacks? Say you play on Dallas and you were eliminated in the playoffs by the Giants. You play safety and you were burned by Burress more times than you care to remember. Seriously, why wouldn’t you throw a little extra at him with a ‘How you like me now?’ attitude?

The solution is easy - especially since all players want to be chosen for the Pro-Bowl but not play in the game: follow Carol’s suggestion and make it into a banquet a la NASCAR.

No harm. No foul. Just a big bucket of Bud, banquet tables, a party (keep it in Hawaii and keep it private), perhaps some roasting and an awards ceremony.

Doesn’t THIS

look waaaaay better than THIS?

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 at 11:37 pm and is filed under Fantoo Blog Home. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.