UPDATE: Big Prince Fielder sized apologies for our feed misbehaving. We swear it’ll be fixed. In the mean time, enjoy the podcast, pink button below. We’ll let you know when the feed is fixed and entertain ourselves by laughing with Chad Ocho Cinco.

Now go kick it in anticipation of Game Day!

Episode 130

Don’t be shocked when you hear the gruff voice opposite Carol in this week’s recording. No, Robin is not suffering from a throat infection, or smoking Pall Malls. Quite the opposite - she’s in Lobsterland drinking in the last few days of Summer (along with quite a bit of wine). But because the world of sport is bursting at the seams while Robin takes restorative action, we decided to let an honorary host into the inner sanctum otherwise known as our studio.

Before we leave you with this masterpiece, we want to remind you that The Girls will be present and accounted for at Studio 4 for their SIRIUS satellite radio show this Monday, Labor Day. Happy end of summer to you all and bring on the FOOTBALL!

Episode 130

Today The Girls, one half played by Ron, the infamous mythical husband of Carol, are coming to you live from California Cryobank, where to-be parents are hand picking athletic sperm to create the next Tom Brady. Yea, cuz that works. Once the child is shoved head first into a helmet the rebellion occurs and he or she will instead become a ping pong player. Or swim dancer. Or worse - a curler. Be careful what you wish, pay and push for. Just ask the parents of Jericho Scott, the nine year old pitching phenom who was just too darn fast and accurate. He and his team have been banished from their New Haven, Connecticut little league division. Parents of the kids on other teams thought Jericho was taking the fun out of sports. We assume they didn’t go to the Cryobank, and instead are crying tears because their little Junior isn’t up to snuff. To which we say, Parents - GET OVER YOURSELVES! Your kids just want to have fun. And you are simply too freaking involved.

They ought to just take a look at the USC football team to see what happens to star athletes. There’s an itch that demands to be scratched in sunny SoCal, and we think it must have something to do with Britney Spears, not the new compression shorts they are blaming.

Perhaps Matt Leinart can suggest a soothing emulsion. While some may say we have been a bit premature in announcing that he’s not the starting quarterback for the Arizona Cardinals, we say we are Nostradamus. Sometimes we get a little Dutch Daulton on the Fantoo Girls sports podcast. Sue us. Or congratulate us when it all comes true.

Mini-me? We’re not so sure about that one, Prince Fielder. Perhaps if you were in fact THE Prince you could make that claim when standing next to CC Sabathia, but you look about 250 and Mr. Cuddly is at least 290. We call that twins.

Whatever the moniker, it matters not when you are playing lights out baseball. Keep it up, and keep up the cans of mac & cheese because it seems to suit you. The Girls say it’s CC all the way for the Cy Young award, again. Changing leagues and upping the ante to a sweet 1.59 ERA is enough for us. Maybe they’ll give you a sash and you can turn it into a sail for that new boat you can buy in the off-season.

Oh, Babe. Our hearts break as you crack a cold one in your grave. You, of all people, would understand the heartbreak that is the final season at Yankee Stadium. But you wouldn’t understand how they could have tanked and the Rays (manna, gamma, Ray-bans…your guess is as good as ours) sit atop the pile. Trust us, network executives share your bewilderment. The Girls? We loves us some Rays. So here’s to the return of Evan Longoria and the continued success of a team whose owners really and truly get it. Anyone who drinks Prisoner and puts a winner on the field for less than the cost of a stealth bomber is royalty in our book.

Lo and behold…instant replay hits the diamond. Kidding aside, we salute Bud Selig for taking a stand and making it happen. He’s playing this one perfectly. We shiver at the thought of the Fantoo Girls becoming Bud Selig groupies, but it just might happen. First thing we would do if we hung with the Commish? Take him to Barney’s for a little wardrobe update. Then we’d go to the zoo, run through fountains and play backgammon in Central Park with a picnic complete with some Prisoner. Girls can dream.

There’s nothing we love more than a man who is decisive. Congrats to Michael Strahan for realizing he’s just not that into it anymore. We feel for the Giants defense, and especially for defensive coordinator Steve Spagnuola who has his work cut out for him with Osi Umenyiora sidelined for the season. The Giants defensive made many fans’ dreams come true last year, but they couldn’t grant our wish - abolishing preseason games to prevent injury when nothing is on the line. Darn.

And before we close this week’s podcast, we travel down Beijing’s memory lane. More on the Olympics when Robin returns from her New England vacation. She says she is fishing and water skiing, but we all know she is ‘huddling’ with Belichick. We overheard her mumbling something about getting Larry Mendte to help her hack into the Jets cute little Huddle system. We could be wrong, but we could be right. And, yes, we may be crazy.

Finally, in this week’s IT HAS TO BE SAID we get you all jazzed about London. Boris Johnson is our new crush. This man is priceless. In one short YouTube clip he has captured our hearts.

So grab a Boddington’s, a poorly fitted suit and some whiff whaff…it’s time to talk sports with The Girls!

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 28th, 2008 at 11:13 am and is filed under Fantoo Blog Home. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.