Episode 122

Break Ups, Spankings, and Dangerous Bases with The Girls!

Today The Girls are coming to you live from Break Up Central, where AskMen.com has all the answers on how to gently and permanently “fire” your significant other. And you tell just by looking at this picture that they have a bond.

Clearly, Omar Minaya is a subscriber as he followed their rules to the ‘T’. The Girls are certain it was painful, but sometimes you have to set someone (Willie Randolph) free. If he (Willie) comes back to you he’s yours. If he (Willie) runs into the open arms of Hank Steinbrenner he is the property of the Yankees. PS: The NY Media was miffed because they got shafted by Omar. Brilliant move Omar…no offense meant media-at-large.

Moving deeper into this week’s sports podcast, we marvel at the skills of Sir Tiger Woods. And Carol eats crow because she thought he was pulling a Pierce with all that grimacing, when in fact he was dealing with two stress fractures that he did not disclose prior to the US Open.

She respects Tiger’s unwillingness to make his knee the story (thereby distracting one and all from his prowess with the clubs), and is starting to learn to love crow, medium-rare.

Oh! SURPRISE!!!!! Alexander Ovechkin wins the Hart Trophy.

Guess our order for his MVP T-shirts will be shipped now.

Under the bright lights of Sin City a sinister mystery unfolds as Oakland Raider Javon Walker tries to explain what really went down. Was he attacked in his room? On the street? Or did he beat himself up and hawk his jewelry to pay a gambling debt? Coming to a ‘48 Hours’ near you soon.

Over on the hardwood the World Champion Celtics pureed the Los Angeles Lakers in a total smack down. We’re not sure if we have seen a loss so humiliating before. One thing is for sure: the Celtics won because we bought our Sirius Producer, Erik, a pair of Bob Cousy All-American super rare low tops from 1956 as a good luck charm. In Celtic green of course. Size 14. (It’s just like us to take all the credit, no?)

The real reason the Celtics won? They played defense. All teams built around the finesse European game are rabidly researching Plan B. Our hope is that the Lakers carry over the pain of this defeat and give us a show next season.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. takes the checkered flag in a win that was a long time a comin’. So deserved. He’s been consistent, professional, dedicated and removed from drama. His concentration on the track ought to have the other drivers quaking in their Pumas. The only way in which he can improve is to take Robin’s advice and GO GREEN! Off we go to the diamond. Now that the playoffs in the NBA and NHL are over, The Girls are free to dig deep and finally uncover the reason behind all the remarkable injuries suffered by baseball players this season. Their first area of focus is on the oh-so dangerous swath of dirt that connects the bases. Something is seriously amiss there. We smell class action lawsuit.

And in this week’s IT HAS TO BE SAID, The Girls suggest that you steer clear of food that could star in a horror movie. So grab your local produce, a rally cap, and tip it to the Celtics - it’s time to talk sports with The Girls!

This entry was posted on Thursday, June 19th, 2008 at 10:32 am and is filed under Fantoo Blog Home. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.