You’ll find we have a lot to say about the inner workings of sports in our latest ‘cast. We couldn’t just fit it all into an hour. So get ready to chip away at our start-of year marathon. We promise we’ll keep it short and sweet for the rest of 2008.

BCS, BS and NFL Playoffs with The Girls!
Episode 102

Today The Girls are coming to you live from the Fantoo production, “And We Waited All Season for THIS?”, which will probably go straight to DVD along with most of Jessica Simpson’s efforts.

Doesn’t matter as the BCS Championship game was dead on arrival as far as we’re concerned. What with that 50 day lay-off (let’s just say that again - 50 DAYS), networks rigging the team selection and pitiful pairings, we’ve had enough. Don’t make it seem harder than it is, stop trying to bleed as much cash from the sport as possible and figure out a playoff system now. And get this guys…it’s been done before…that whole playoff thing. This movie blows, so we bolt.

The lights have not gone out on Broadway, but they have gone out on the Los Angeles Lakers. Now this is how we want to watch a basketball game. Nice and dark, and when the play on the court is a little tired you can neck. If they still do that kind of thing. It’s so throwback, don’t you think?

Makes us wish for some cotton candy and an egg cream. But, alas, the Mitchell Report just won’t die. However, any suspicion that the league and the teams were responsible for the entire steroid mess to begin with has taken its last breath. You’ll have to listen to the podcast to hear The Girls’ latest conspiracy theory on why Roger Clemens is telling the truth. Here’s a solution: call a spade a spade and have the managers acknowledge that they were all about entertainment from the beginning. Admit all steroid use and put real entertainers in charge of the teams so that everything is transparent. How does THIS look to you?

Ted S. Warren/AP

A big fat congratulations to Goose Gossage on his election to the MLB Hall of Fame. In Goose’s honor, our Fan-Tutor takes a stab at the strange and shrouded ritual that is the election process itself. Like the game, it’s complex.

The NFL Playoffs are here and there’s not a team in the next round that doesn’t deserve to still be alive. Take THAT, BCS! But the real question is why Jason Witten was on vacation with Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson? Um, we’re actually kind of scared to learn the real truth. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Did we mention that her parents were there too? Ewww!!!!!!

The Girls are glad Arthur Blank is shooting high, but we just hope that Pete Carroll doesn’t lead him on and then dump him when it hurts the most - right after all the other coaches worth their salt are hired by other teams. We know not every wedding can be this perfect:

But we just can’t take another year of turmoil for the Falcons, and we’re not even Falcons fans. Atlanta, we bleed for you. Though some franchises simply thrive on drama.

Funny little match up, that Patriots V. Jaguars game. The Jags run like cat burglars
from The Clapper. And the Patriots, well, they’re like the debutantes on the night of the ball. You can spill red wine on their pure white dresses, but they will never break their perfect little smiles, even as they dig their 5-inch stiletto squarely between the numbers. As expected, this will be the one to watch, but why watch just one game this weekend? Give in. Go deep. Go for four.

In this week’s IT HAS TO BE SAID, The Girls beg for both sides to compromise, hug, become one. Because if we have to watch five nights of reality television we will go Britney on you. So grab your peace pipe, stock the fridge and settle in - it’s time to talk sports with The Girls!

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 10th, 2008 at 9:15 am and is filed under Fantoo Blog Home. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.